The Stephening Standard 2021

 

Yeah, yeah, it's been two years since I have posted an update

 

And lots has happened.

So, for the takeaway version, just read/look at the following. 

If you're interested in more detail, just click on the links in the following.

 

Zach graduates high school - sort of (Nov 2020)

Zach finished high school in late 2019, but the Headmaster stopped him from "walking" at graduation because he was skateboarding.

Zach however, was not too phased.

A couple of days after his non-graduation, he delighted those who were watching the limousines delivering everyone to the School Formal.

Zach showed up on his skateboard.

 

Homeless by Design (Dec 2020)

When Zach was eight, I told him that in 10 years time, we would leave our happy yellow home in Coolangatta. 

Eleven days after Zach's 18th birthday, he and I moved out of our home of the last 17.5 years.

I am now a homeless wanderer.

Zach is off setting up his own life with lots of adventures: he was working in a fast-food restaurant, then as a driver for a pizza restaurant, then an attendant on a ski-train down in the snow. Then a lock-down shut down the ski-fields and left him unemployed although he enjoyed receiving a welfare payment for some months. He's now working as a baggage-handler at the Gold Coast airport.

Hiking the Bibbulmun Track (April-June 2021)

With all my plans to sail to islands in the Pacific or the Indian Ocean crushed by The Pandemic, I decided to hike the 1000kms (600 miles) of the Bibbulmun Track in Western Australia. 

Click on the following link to see my summary of the Bibbulmun Track in 50 images.

 

 

 

 

Adventures along the coast of Queensland (July-September 2021) 

I spent the winter months (July to September) back on the coast of Queensland. 

I hiked the Cooloola Great Walk from Noosa to Rainbow Beach and back.

I sailed as a volunteer on the South Passage, a sail-training ship based in Manly, Brisbane.

And I helped on a delivery of 49' racing yacht from Townsville to Brisbane.

No link yet as I'm still processing the photos. Check back at the end of January 2021!

Coast to coast road trip (October-November 2021)

In October, I set off to weave my way across Australia from the Gold Coast, Queensland to Albany, Western Australia.  

This trip would normally be about 4000kms, but due to various state and territory restrictions on travel due to COVID, I had to go through the west of Queensland into the Northern Territory, then south to Port Augusta in South Australia, and then west into Western Australia.

The journey was 8000kms long!

No link yet as I'm still processing the photos. Check back end of January 2021!

 

 

The Stephening Standard - 2019

Happy new decade / year / day

Here's my under 400-word, no-obligation (to read), standard, irregular biennale ("buyer gnarly") providing highlights and happenings for Zach and me over the last two years.

There are links to more detailed posts provided (if you are interested):

December 2019 - Zach obtained his car driver's licence and both he and my car have disappeared from my life.

October 2019 - I sailed across the Tasman on a 45' sailboat with two other guys in preparation for my heading out with a backpack to sail as a crew for whoever at the end of 2020.

May 2019 - Zach soloed in a glider.

Listen 'ear mate !

May 2019 - I delivered a philosophy course in Hong Kong to a bunch of Macquarie University Masters students resident in Hong Kong.

February 2019 - I headed out to Western Australia for a month to see Mum (Perth), Dad (Albany), and to do lots of paragliding with my uni friend Peter.

January 2019 - Zach went to France by himself, transferred through Charles De Gaulle airport to join a flight to Toulouse, and stayed for a month with our beloved French family near to Toulouse. I figure he had a great time because I barely heard from him.

July 2018 - Zach passed me in height and so, was able to see my tonsure more clearly. He has ensured my humility henceforth by patting me on my bald patch whenever I get a little uppity.

June 2018 - Zach and I hiked the Jatbula trail (65km, five days and nights) in Northern Territory of Australia.

February 2018 - I hiked the Routeburn track in NZ (65km, five days and nights) with my mates Tom and Connie in February 2018 (sorry, but I have not posted any images or report yet - check back later).

And some random observations on stuff:

• telephones (short & sharp)
• philosophy (a.k.a mind massage - wordy!!!!)
• paragliding (mostly pics)

 

 

The Stephening Standard - 2016

Goodbye 2016!

Here's some of the gems out of 2016 for Zach and me.

Click on the links to see more about anything that interests you.

Or not!

Out of the mouths of adolescents

Zach is beginning to show his age! 

Some of his observations are both funny and perceptive.

Sailing in Shark Bay - a short history

October 25 1616, Dirk Hartog landed at a remote western point of Western Australia and left an inscribed pewter plate. 

October 25 2016, I visited this still remote point in a small (4.5m) open sailing dinghy.

Here's my short history of the various visitors (including my own visit) to this location.

A walk on the wilderness side (Hong Kong)

Going to Hong Kong and want to get away from it all? 

For a predominantly urban landscape, it has a surprising amount of wilderness to explore. Here's a few that I discovered that I think are simply awesome.

Thai sailas exploring the Andaman Sea

In July, Zach and I and six others chartered a 40' catamaran and sailed the Andaman sea in Thailand.

Here are just four highlights.

Zoey's Last Wander

Zoey our pet dog was an inveterate escape artist. In June, she wandered away for the last time. This is the story of Zoey's last wander.

Indian Pacific Train Experience

In January after a family gathering in WA to celebrate a bunch of birthdays, Zach and I returned to the east by train.

It was a most excellent experience.

Shared parenting and Star Wars

Zach now spends nine days out of every 14 with me and has done so for about a year or so now. 

The process by which this came about is interesting and gives Zach an opportunity make yet another funny and perceptive observation, this time drawing on a Star Wars metaphor to illustrate his point.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Okay, that's all folks!

Hello 2017.

See you there.

Stephening Standard 2015

Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana
(Groucho Marx)

ABOUT TIME !

Time passes. It’s a journey, a one-way journey, a l-o-n-g one-way journey – if we’re lucky!

Here I am with a teenage son (Zach turned 13 in December 2015) and octogenarian parents (they both rolled into their 80s in 2015, well actually, happily, they both walked into their 80s).

Meanwhile, I have not provided any update to friends and family for some time. I clearly missed the end of 2015 given that this missive did not issue until the end of the first quarter of 2016.

The update on 2014 never left my laptop. Just like the software really - just sits there as a legacy reminding me that I, like my computer hardware,  seem to be getting older and slower.

Can too much time pass? 

Does an un-issued annual update begin to discolour and smell like some of the things in my fridge? Wasn't it always going to be yesterday’s news? Doesn't a memoir regreen our memories, offers a nostalgic memento, the past brought back into the present? (For more thoughts in this vein, you might like to review the Rolling Stones 1967 song, Yesterdays Papers - will you look at that mini-skirt!)

I know I love receiving updates from all of you in whatever form and time you do it. Moreover, I was encouraged by the words of one friend who in her Christmas 2015 update, invited me and her friends to write some words and send some photos. I should note that her update was issued in print, sent via snailmail, from the US and received before Christmas 2015. Her encouraging words are tempered, undermined even, by her own impressive timeliness.

And still time passes.

Go here for updates (www.insideoutsite.blogspot.com) on all I've done in the last two years.

About time: better late than never!

Stephening Standard 2013

A Stop-Work!

Back in 2011, I experienced a mid-life event and inevitably, I bought a motorbike. Crisis? No crisis! Just something different and lots of fun.

Then in late 2012, my mind turned to thoughts of retirement. Actually, I had thought of this before, but when I discussed my idea of early retirement with one dear friend, she scoffed and said: “You have to have something to retire from – academic life barely counts as working!”

The 'Retired' Version vs the 'Working' Version

Regardless, when Bond University called for voluntary redundancies at the end of 2012, I decided to say ‘Yes’. Closest thing to a 'golden handshake' that I was ever likely to get.

Zach was a little concerned I think at the idea that I no longer had a job. However, I took the time to explain to him that I had retired and he seemed happy with that. 

However, 24 hours later, he came back from school with the pronouncement that I could not be retired, “you are too young.” Apparently the teachers had expressed some disbelief about my being retired. I sent young Zach back to school telling him he should ask his teachers about the meaning of the word ‘envy.’

Of course, I have not stopped ‘working’ completely - nor started working any more effectively. I am still working on wrapping up my Master’s degree in philosophy; my thesis is now about nine months overdue. With the help of a past student and tutor at Bond, I completed a consulting project down in Canberra which was great fun. 

Most importantly, the book The Other Glass Ceiling on which I have been working for some years with colleague Charles Areni was submitted to the publishers in the second half of 2013. We are currently looking through the edits and it is likely to be published later this year.

Outback Spectacular

Zach & Mary Poppins

In July, I took Zach on an outback tour during his school holidays. 

We first drove from the Gold Coast up to Maryborough which is the birthplace of both his mother and the author of Mary Poppins! (She was a rather prickly and difficult woman – PL Travers that is – and you will learn more about her if you go and see the film Saving Mr Banks).

We arrived in Maryborough and went to a pub for dinner just around the corner from the statue commemorating the birthplace of PL Travers (see left) only to discover we had arrived the night before the annual Mary Poppins festival - so of course, we joined in the period-festival featuring steam-trains and the many characters in the eight books about Mary Poppins.

We then drove up to Rockhampton, and turned west heading out to Sapphire just beyond Emerald. We stayed there for a couple of days allowing some time for Zach to find sapphires, and garnet and various other semi-precious stones.

From there, we drove out through Barcaldine (home to the Tree of Knowledge where the Australian Labor Party was born in 1891), Longreach (bit unnerving to see a QANTAS jumbo jet parked right next to the road with people walking around on the wing), and on to Winton. 

Winton with a population of less than 1000 people is located about 1000kms from the coast and was our western-most point. What do you think that Winton’s claim to fame might be?

(a)    first home of QANTAS

(b)    place where Banjo Paterson wrote Waltzing Matilda

(c)    location of some of the best dinosaur finds in Australia

(d)    all of the above

The best answer is ‘d’! Winton is a wonderful oddity featuring all of the above along with Arno’s wall (made up of multiple engines, typewriters, sewing machines, boat propellers, motorbikes and other oddities), a musical fence, a great museum and more.

Zach at sunset at Blandensburg National Park

In our great journey to the backblocks of western Queensland, we found interesting characters (such as Mary Poppins, gem-fossickers, grey nomads and various assorted outback characters), buried treasures (sapphires, garnets, boulder opals), wildlife (alive, recently dead and ancient), and much more besides (hot artesian spring spas, agricultural machinery displays, Aboriginal artefacts, etc).

France, Hawaii, Turkey

I was invited to visit the Grenoble Ecole de Management in May, and flew over to France to give a talk and visit the school. I was super-impressed and would love to find myself a partial appointment there if possible.

Another trip in August took me to Hawaii to a conference, but also allowed me to engage in all the great activities offered in Hawaii – hiking, running, swimming, surfing, kiteboarding, SUPing, etc.

The BIG trip abroad this year was when I skippered a 49’ yacht in a ‘blue cruise’ along the Turkish coast with my Dad as my first mate. He unfortunately got Turkey-tummy (maybe scurvy, or alcohol-poisoning, or giardia), but once that was cured, he was on a roll. Details and images of this trip appear in a separate post below.

Plans for 2014

I will be teaching from January to April (as an 'adjunct' or 'sessional' teacher), I plan to spend three months in France with Zach (April-June), another two months near Delhi, India teaching (Aug-Oct). 

Zach is aiming to complete his primary schooling this year and advancing to high school (year 7) next year.

Zach going the way of the dinosaurs

THE STEPHENING STANDARD : Taking a ‘Captain Cook’ at 2010

(For the non-Aussie speakers, 'Captain Cook' means 'look' in rhyming slang)

New Year With the Rugrats

To see in 2010, Zach and I found ourselves on the island of Rottnest in Western Australia. Rottnest is from the Dutch for 'rat's nest' so named for the little animals found then and now all over the island. The little animals are in fact quokkas, a type of marsupial. The other little animals that populate this island (aside from tourists) are flies – as can be seen on my forehead in the following photo!

On Rottnest island, Zach and I joined my first cousin, David (from London), his wife Marian (from Perth), and my first cousins once removed (ie, their children). Zach spent most of his time with his second cousins (David's children).

I take a detour here to describe labelling of cousins which may be something you have always wanted to know about but never quite understood.

Degree of cousinship (first, second, third, etc.) is defined by the most recent common ancestor beginning with grandparent (first), great-grandparent (second), great-great-grandparent (third), etc.

Removal describes the number of generations separating any cousins. David's kids and I are related through grandparents to me (making them 'first cousins'), but they are one generation further away (my grandparents are their great-grandparents), so they are my first cousins once removed.

A Grand Tour

Zach joined me on my annual trip to Europe in June/July. One of the big highlights of this trip for Zach was a day spent exploring a forest with two of his French friends, Jean and Thomas (who are I believe second cousins to one another)

In the forest, we followed various trails, picked blackberries (not very ripe), hunted slugs (various colours and sizes - feel free to ask for photos), listened for bears, forded streams, squelched through water, swatted mosquitoes and stopped to eat packets of crisps.

Another memorable moment for Zach was spending some time with my father and his wife (Pauleen) in the tiny village of Montcuq in the Lot region of France. I'm not sure if I will be able to do this again as I discovered that Zach was not only out roaming the streets but ripping them up (see picture below):

Other highlights were a v-e-r-y l-o-n-g train trip from France to Italy, a visit to Monte Carlo (Zach as a car-enthusiast was enchanted by this stop), and a stay in Varenna on Lago di Como to celebrate the 50^th birthday of a primary school friend, Kim Cramer.

Yes, we went past George Clooney's house. He happened to be there and hollered out to me 'Hi Stephen', but I told him I was busy and we kept on moving. I note in passing that George will be celebrating his 50^th this year (2011). I consider this another of his sad attempts to emulate me.

Semi-Centennial Celebration

I celebrated my 50^th birthday in August 2010 with a Hawaiian theme boat trip on the Tweed River. If you think you were there, but you don't remember it – you're in good company!

My father having donated funds for the libations for this party was of course put on drinks duty. I bought various drinks, ice, loaded them into ice-chests and sent my Dad off to the wharf where the boat trip was to start. He was instructed to offer a welcome drink to those arriving early for the boat trip. I wondered how Dad would identify those going on the boattrip to offer them a drink. Dad's response was straightforward : "If they're wearing anything that looks vaguely Hawaiian, I will offer them a drink."

It is reported that street people in the Tweed region have taken up wearing Hawaiian shirts since that day.

Meanwhile, here are two 50-year old reprobates (Stephen and Kim) talking about the problem of the youth today.  They're not only old, but they clearly have poor long-term memory as well.

Vanuatu

Zach and I travelled to Vanuatu in September to join my brother (Timothy), his wife Louise and their son Mitchell (a first cousin to Zach of course). We also had the good fortune to be shown around the island by a first cousin to Louise called Brian who lives on Vanuatu with his wife and kids. Brian introduced us to the joys of hydroponic kava – or at least, I reckon it must have been hydroponic!

I loved Vanuatu for its unpretentiousness and the fact that many of the people there speak English and French and Bislama and one of the many native languages. Vanuatu used to be known as the New Hebrides and has the rather unusual claim to fame as being one of the only joint British / French colonies in the world from 1906 until it gained its independence in 1980.

Brian and his family showed us many wonderful things on the island, but one of the highlights for me was the trip to a coral beach on the other side of the island. The photo shows (from the left) Jessie & Chloe (second cousins to Mitchell), Zach (first cousin to Mitchell) and Mitchell on his way out.

The Big Issues in Life

Zach finished Year 2 in 2010 and starts Year 3 in 2011. In the picture below, Captain Kidd, The Great White Hunter (Zach) and Hiawatha are in a serious discussion about the world's problems (how to lift the ban on fighting Kung Zhu pets in the playground) at Cudgen Primary School.


More seriously, Zach is probably telling them about how I announced to him that in ten years from now, we (yes, he and I) will be moving out of home. I figured it is good to get in early. I have told him that I plan to buy a yacht and sail around the South Pacific for a couple of years.

He was concerned about where he might go and asked if he could come with me. I said he was welcome to join me for some of the time. He then asked me how he might see his mother every other week. I guess we're going to have to do some more talking on this one!

Even more seriously, I have launched a website with my colleague Charles : www.theotherglassceiling.com. Visit to see what I have been working on for the last year or so.



Here's looking forward to 2011. I hope that you and yours have a wonderful year.

Stephening Standard – 2009

Happy 2010. I hope that 2009 was great for you, I hope that 2010 will be even better.

Attached, you will find a short update on the what Zach and I have been doing over the last year or so.

Zach does his commute in his sleep

Zach is a well-established bus-commuter taking the journey of over one hour between our home in Coolangatta to his school at Cudgen in New South Wales.

However, as our home is in Queensland without day-light saving, and his school is in New South Wales with day-light saving, the morning routine can be a little frantic during the summer months.

Zach began taking the bus at his insistence last year while he was still in his first year at school (‘Kinder’).

His first bus-driver, Bones (pictured) reports that Zach is very social during the bus-journey.

However, during the last 15 minutes of the ride home, there is no-one else on the bus, and Zach sometimes falls asleep.

On his second-ever trip, I had to carry Zach from the bus. Zach awoke as I carried him out of the bus and he announced how lucky it was that he had not fallen asleep.

Very lucky indeed.

Miles of smiles

Zach and I visited our dear friends, the family Larrieu south of Toulouse in July 2009. There Zach got to practice his French with Jean (both pictured below).

Zach who is very much into vehicles of all kinds was delighted to be able to visit the A380 factory while we were in Toulouse.

In 2008, Zach got to practice French when we were kindly accommodated first by the family Bitaud-Zerathe, and then by the family De Clercq on two separate visits to New Caledonia.

While sitting in the airport lounge in New Caledonia on our return from one of these trips, Zach was asking about which airline we would be taking for our return journey.

He recognised Qantas, I pointed out Air Calin and Air New Zealand to him.

Then, in the clear innocent voice that only a young boy can produce, Zach made a curious observation : “There aren’t many virgins here, are there Papa?” (Zach was referring to the Australian/Oceanic airline Virgin-Blue, part of Branson’s Virgin Group.)

That’s right Zach, our work here is done. Time for us to go home!

Couch potato to super-hero
Zach has applied for the position of couch-potato in the household.

He is very fond of his television.

Despite a letter to Santa requesting a Wii, I am glad to see that the big old fellow did not oblige.

Accordingly, I’m always delighted when I can get Zach off the couch.

I was less pleased however when Zach jumped off the couch while playing and managed to break his arm.

Despite the painful break, Zach was soon back in action as a super-hero – albeit with a clipped wing.

Over the renovations
Our home has been under renovation since about mid-2008.

Our home now sports a wonderful new deck overlooking the ocean at Coolangatta. Come and join us for a drink there sometime.

The kitchen and bathroom have been re-done, a new bathroom-ensuite added to Zach’s bedroom, and a repaint in and out.

In his visit during last winter, Dad was put to the task of putting a mural on the garage door.

Here, Zach and Dad show-off his handiwork.

Other stuff

I continue to work at Bond University on a 50% contract.

In the remainder of my time, I do parenting, consulting, and writing.

I am working on a book project dealing with gender inequality with a colleague of mine down at the University of Sydney, Charles Areni.

Charles and I were students together at the University of Florida many years ago.

In my spare time, I am pushing forward – very slowly – towards an MA in philosophy and sociology.

I completed my 49th year on this planet in August 2008, and am currently celebrating the passage of my 50th year.

I will celebrate the closing of this my jubilee year around Sunday, 1 August, 2010.

Let me know if you are in town and would like to join me.

For more on what I have been doing and thinking over time, please visit my blog : www.insideoutsite.blogspot.com

The Stephening Standard (v6, 2007)

Zac at MiniSchool
in 2007
wearing his favourite
Holden t-shirt

Editoral - Life at Last

If you wake up, it is a good day…you’re alive at least. Getting the annual newsletter from Stephen may not make it a good day, but at least you know he is still alive.

The year 2007 was a very big year for me. It was not all good, and not all bad. Two big events are discussed in the following However, 2007 was a major turn-around year for me and that was great.

The big news in the here and now is that Zac started ‘Big School’ yesterday. I am proud to say that I did not cry – at least not while anyone was looking. So 2008 is looking great…but now, for a brief review of the highlights of 2007.

Papa & Zac
building card houses
at the weekly
French conversation
breakfast

The Good News - Lost in Love

The sometimes annual Latin Ball at Bond University happened on Friday, March 16, 2007. As I was walking toward the venue, I saw a ravishing dark-haired beauty standing looking a little lost.

She turned to ask me if I knew the location of the Princeton Room which was the location of the Latin Ball. It was with great pleasure that I offered to accompany her there…and beyond as it later turned out.

However, it was not ever too easy between us. Is it ever? Jeanette had been invited to the Ball by one of my friends, Marie-Claire. Marie-Claire as a perpetual match-maker had rather hoped that Jeanette might hook up with a particular fellow at the Ball – not me! This other guy quickly made it clear he shared the same hope. To fuel his hope, he had the good fortune to end up on the same table as Jeanette.

The odds against me seemed long, but I was not giving up. I managed to snatch some dances and some brief conversation with Jeanette when her attentive companion let his guard down briefly – for the call of nature or the bar or perhaps both as one seems inevitably to lead to the other. I later got her number from Marie-Claire, gave her a call, and we went from there.

Zac, Jeanette, Mac and Keaton

However, some challenges remained. Jeanette was in the process of embarking on an effort to immigrate to the US. She planned to join her sister who lives there. Together they wanted to help their parents living in South Africa to immigrate to the US.

Ultimately, Jeanette decided to head to the US. She did ask if I would go too – ironically to Jacksonville, Florida about 60 minutes from Gainesville where I lived when studying in the US in the 90s.

However, as the other love of my life lives with me one week out of every two, and his other week is with his mother who lives just 15 minutes from my home, I declined her offer.

And so it ended. I learned that I am capable of loving again, and I’m still capable of attracting challenging women! Despite that, I thoroughly enjoyed our six-month sojourn.

Bad News - Suspicion & Intrigue

August 21, 2007 was a crap day to begin with, and it only got worse. The weather sucked…it was rainy, windy and all-round miserable. I was with my neighbour and his two boys, Mac and Keaton (you can see them in the picture with Jeanette and Zac). Mac had been with Zac and me for the afternoon. Mac’s dad and his other brother, Keaton, had come around to join the fun.

A ring at the doorbell heralded the end of the fun for me although I did not know it at the time. At my door were three police officers and two child safety officers.

In short, it was alleged (by an anonymous person) I was sexually abusing Zac. I was given no alternative but to submit to an interview myself, and to subsequently submit Zac to an interview with these same people without me or anyone that he knew present.

I will not go into further details here other than to say that after about 30+ minutes, the five people left without any apology and simply telling me that they felt there was no substantiation for the case made. It was a dark day as you can imagine.

Further details (read : an impassioned account of the event that I wrote the day after) elsewhere on this blog (see August 2007). One piece is entitled ‘confessions of a putative child abuser’; the other is a brief essay ‘on the nature of abuse’.

I survived, Zac has appeared to have come through the process unscathed thankfully.

The lesson to learn here is that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it. The other lesson is that when whatever hits the fan, it is not going to be distributed evenly.

(Above and Left)

A labyrinth
on Coolangatta Beach
that I built with some mates

But Wait, There’s More

As noted earlier, lot of things changed for me in 2007. I won the right in court to move to week about with Zachary in December – and that is now in place and Zac appears to be very happy with it.

I also won the right to take Zac away on extended overseas holidays beginning in 2010.

I have cut back to a 50% contract in my job at Bond University in order to be able to look after Zac half time.

I have also taken up study again. I am currently studying towards a MA in philosophy and sociology. I hope to give more detail on this project at the end of this year.

I hope 2008 is great year for you & yours.

Cheers, Stephen.

Dejeuner au Chateau Larrieu
just south of Toulouse in June